I Hope You Have the Time of Your Life

I think I speak on behalf of all the returning Ranchers when I say that this semester has seen a stark change from the last. Most catastrophic of these changes is the loss of 5 good people from our midst. How do you replace a Kevin Wagstaff? Where do you look for the sugar sweet smile of a Zach Williamson? Who other than Matt Webb would walk into your room and use your tweezers without asking(I must admit that I miss this a little bit)? How can you emulate the flawless style of Cameron Hadley? Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, if Cole Walker doesn't ward off the imminent zombie takeover, who will?

This deep loss has led me to much pondering. During the course of said pondering it seemed that despite my best efforts, I just couldn't keep Good Riddance out of my mind. It is inseperably connected with quiet reminiscence. I would like to say a few words about each of our now departed brethren.

I shall start with Mr. Williamson. Not only was Zack perhaps the nicest gentleman on our whole floor, but he was also never short of his year's supply of food. One could swing by the Williamson/Derenthal residence and recieve a bear hug, a smile, and a handful of pixie sticks. Zack had an uncanny nack for filling your emotional flask with happinness that would last for days. You may not have read about this in parade magazine, but Spyglass entertainment initially planned for Zack to play the lead role in Invictus. Williamson held out for a better contract, and was finally wooed away by the gleaming lights of BYU's Nelke theatre, where he performed most wonderfully, and won the hearts of every girl within a 50 mile radius. Spyglass was forced to settle for Matt Damon. They had also planned for Anthony Juliana to play the role of Nelson Mandella. That didn't work out either. Zack leaves for his mission in Virginia in 6 days. He is sure to be a success. The people of Virginia will be richly blessed by his service.

Cameron Hadley. The pinnacle of class. Athlete extraodinaire. Contributor to no less than 35 intramural teams. A man among men. I still remember the first "dance party" we ever had. Cameron Hadley was running the show like an underground New York dj. He had girls wrapped around his finger like spaghetti on a fork. Cameron is now preparing for his mission in Spain, where he will have to use every ounce of his ingenuity to keep Spanish girls to keep from falling in loves with his rugged good looks and boyish charm.

Cole Walker once told me that he lived his life by one simple rule: What would John Elway do? Granted, Cole may never have played in five super bowls and won two of those. But Cole did have some moments that were reminiscient of this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ja69mTbL388. What most people don't know about Cole is that he was actually the fifth member of the Beatles when they first kicked off their career, but they kicked him out because he refused to sit for this photoshoot http://thejosevilson.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/beatles.jpg. Cole Walker departs for his mission in six days. The people of North Carolina better look out. Cole is going to take the place by storm.

Matthew Thomas Webb. He was a man of few words, as evidenced by his Elder's Quorum lessons. But he was also a man of great words. An inspiration speaker the likes of which this building has never seen before and surely cannot ever hope to see again. One would often see Matt walking around in just a pair of jeans, eating some chocolate covered almonds, and playing the ukulele. For those of you who have more intimate relationships with the Ranch, you may know that Matt and I recorded a few hit songs back in the day. These include "I like the way you smell" and "Please don't be angry that I forgot your name." Matt leaves for his mission in Zurich, Switzerland in who knows how long. We hope to see his shining face in Provo a few more times before he leaves.

I saved Kevin Bjorn Wagstaff for last, because (and I do not mean this in any sort of deregatory way to those who have already been spoken about) he is perhaps the closest to my heart. I could put any number of links up in this paragraph to illustrate my deep respect for Kevin Bjorn, but I think that when I consider the pantheon of youtube clips were uncovered, only one stands out from the rest. Here it is http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kn481KcjvMo. You just can't put a price on that. Kevin and I shared toothpaste and memories for almost four months. Kevin departs for Mexico City on February 3rd to go preach the gospel. He is a great guy and he's going to be a great missionary.

Gentleman, we wish you the best on your missions and in your life. You are great examples. When I think of you five gentlemen, I think of this http://24ahead.com/images/20020815_d081502-515h.jpg. Matt gets to be George Bush.