I know that aside from the mission map the blog has layed/lain/lied/line/been dormant for a while. (Why take the time to find the right word when you can use all of them and put slashes in there? If this bugs you, see if you can pick the correct one and then go google it and comment which one is right. I'll bet you were wrong.)
Like I said, not a lot of action on the blog right now, but there is hope. I have something big planned. It might just be my farewell post. I don't know. It's gonna be big though. I might even dust off my tuxedo for it.
You've been warned. Tell everyone you know to be on the lookout.
Monday, May 10, 2010
Sunday, April 18, 2010
These Are a Few of My Favorite Things
Ladies and gentlemen,
I know that you are hungry. I know what you want. I'm gonna give it to ya.
Here it is. A long list of Brad Corbett's favorite things. Happy almost earth day everybody. Don't expect any earth day presents other than this. This is it.
I know that you are hungry. I know what you want. I'm gonna give it to ya.
Here it is. A long list of Brad Corbett's favorite things. Happy almost earth day everybody. Don't expect any earth day presents other than this. This is it.
Favorite Color: Green. Blue. Purple. (Changes with the seasons)
Favorite Dish: McDonald’s Cheeseburger
Favorite Number: 3
Favorite Shoe: Nike (size 10.5 or 11) feel free to send me new kicks.
Favorite Shoe Style: low top
Favorite Cookie: Chocolate Chip or Double Chocolate Chunk Chip (say four and a half times fast)
Favorite Type of Hug: bear.
Favorite Animal: killer whale
Favorite Computer: not this one.
Favorite Phone: my phone. iPhone I call it.
Favorite Smell: lemons.
Favorite Place on Earth: the mantle.
Favorite Element: Americanium
Favorite Cat: sphynx
Favorite Squiggly on Word when you make a mistake: Green
Favorite Knife: pocket. Watch yourself.
Favorite Greek God: Freakin Ares baby. I love love.
Favorite Country: Canada. they are passive, I am too.
Favorite Hair Color that I don’t have: blonde.
Favorite Type of Staple: two prong.
Favorite Hole-Punch: 3-hole punch with titanium steel that can cut through 64 sheets of paper.
Favorite Equation: y=mx+b
Favorite Winter Sport: swimming
Favorite Missionary Hand Out Card: “Play it with feeling”
Favorite Pizza: cheese.
Favorite Type of Cashew: peanut flavored.
Favorite Color Belt: brown, it goes with everything.
Favorite Color of Sock: white during the summer eclipse
Favorite Setting on the Air Conditioning: a balmy 68 degrees. ..Fahrenheit
Favorite Rapper: Bee-Money
Favorite Football Game Half-time Score: 24-0
Favorite Heart Made From an animal: Flamingo heart.
Favorite time of the day: 11:11 (all ones baby.. forget the deuces)
Favorite Skateboard: DGK (Dirty Ghetto Kids) …that is a real board, I have it.
Favorite Crop: Cotton.
Favorite Type of Water: H2O (purified)
Favorite State Name of the United States: New Jersey (what’s that mean? That’s a uniform!)
Favorite Dance Move: oppo stanky leg (aka Clean Leg)
Favorite T.V. Show after the time of 6pm: American Idol
Favorite T.V. Show before the time of 6pm: Everybody Loves Raymond
Favorite Store in the Cougareat: Sugar & Spice
Favorite key noise: when they jangle.
Favorite Sound ever: the sound of keys being pressed on a firm keyboard.
Favorite Crayon Color: Macaroni n Cheese
Favorite Digital Camera: Kodak
Favorite Mythical Beast: Unikodak (unicorn + Kodiak bear)
Favorite Animal Matchup I would love to see: Kodiak Bear vs. Blue Whale.
These were all written and endorsed by the man, Bradley Michael Corbett himself. Don't believe me. Ask him. He is on the f-book.
Thursday, April 15, 2010
FORGET FINALS WEEK
IT IS OFFICIALLY HUEY LEWIS AND THE NEWS WEEK!
I HOPE YOU'RE ALL AS EXCITED ABOUT THIS AS I AM.
I HOPE YOU'RE ALL AS EXCITED ABOUT THIS AS I AM.
Friday, April 2, 2010
4 Minutes and 33 Seconds
Disclaimer: This post is somewhat more contemplative than my usual work. Hopefully still a little bit funny though.
I went to the library this evening, as I am sometime prone to do on Friday nights. There is something about seeing all the empty tables in the periodicals that makes me feel like a real academic devotee. I just kind of feel like a Nike commercial. I feel like as I take my seat in the library there is a narrator (preferably Morgan Freeman) saying something like, "While everyone else is at some two-bit dance in the Cannon Center, Nick Hales takes his place among the pantheon of BYU greats by studying on a Friday." The lights fade to black...Just do it.
Sidenote: I youtube searched for quite some time to find a Nike commercial I could put here that would properly reflect my vision, but I couldn't find anything. The closest I got was this. You can just imagine me in that commercial, only my head would turn into a textbook.
Unfortunately it turns out that this library session was not one of my greatest library sessions of all time. I had just eaten a five dollar footlong, and this led to a certain degree of sleepiness. I ended up having one of those naps where I wake up in a violent burping fit and both of my hands have fallen asleep. Not my finest hour.
Having not lived up to my big dreams for the library I decided to head back to my humble abode and call it a night. I began my journey in somewhat melancholy spirits. The library was a failure, the footlong was sittin a little weird in my stomache, and it was just starting to snow. I called my brother to say hello, but got the message machine. He texted me back informing me that he was in, "Clash of the Freaking Titans." This boosted my spirits and gave me a slight chuckle because I couldn't decide if he meant, "I'm calling this movie Clash of the Freaking Titans because I think it is so incredibly awesome that it needs a freaking in the title" or "I'm calling this movie Clash of the Freaking Titans because it freaking stinks." Having already seen the movie at the midnight showing this morning, I realized that it was probably the latter.
After this boost in my spirits I was in a considerably better mood. The only thing left to drag me down was the fact that I had Tears for Fears' Everybody Wants to Rule the World stuck in my head. Now at this point most of you are probably thinking, "What's bad about that? I love that song." I love it too. It's just been in my head for far too long. Far too long. This probably resulted from one too many visits over here.
In an attempt to get this song out of my head I tried really really hard to listen to other things that were happening around me. Do other people do this? Do other people try to kick weird songs out of their head by listening as hard as they can to what is going on around them? I hope so.
As I was listening I was reminded of a song that I learned about in my Music 101 class last semester. It was composed by John Cage, and it is titled 4 minutes and 33 seconds. The basic idea is that the piece is simply 4 minutes and 33 seconds of silence. Everyone in the concert hall experiences the piece slightly differently. The music is composed of whatever it is people hear during those 4 minutes and 33 seconds. I performed and listened to my own version of 4 minutes and 33 seconds walking home from the library today.
First of all, I am going to toot my own horn here and just say that I am pretty dang good at performing this piece of music. Pretty dang good.
Since coming to college I have come to appreciate a lot of things. I am a firm believer that one can appreciate almost anything if you learn enough about it. I used to think that modern art was the exception to this rule I have come to appreciate quite a few pieces of art this year, but I still feel like I am not quite there with modern art yet. Clearly these artists are doing something right. People actually appreciate their work. I just have felt at times like I didn't understand what they were all about. I have recently had opportunities to try to learn just what it is that modern artists are trying to do. Still don't understand it. I'm trying.
Tonight as I walked home from the library I feel like I finally appreciated what John Cage was thinking when he did this. Despite the fact that my efforts to listen to the things around me were only incited by a desire to dispose of a Tears for Fears song, I really, really enjoyed listening to my environment. Not in a cliche, random-song-erupts-out-of-regular-noises-in the-surroundings way. Not at all like this.
Sidenote: Some of you might not like me for saying this, but I just don't really like Phil Collins. It's not because he composes modern art, and it's not because I don't know enough about him, I just don't really like his work. Glad I got that off my chest.
I don't share this because I want you all to think that I am some super sophisticated art lover who understands things that you don't. In reality that couldn't really be farther from the truth. However, I sincerely enjoyed taking a second to listen to what was happening around me.
Recently my good man C. Cloyd Barton blogged about how he wanted to be good at basketball. He called for people to comment on his blog about what they would like to be good at. Of course, my initial response was that I would like to be good at eating lots of hot dogs really really fast. However, in the spirit of seriousness, I think I would like to be better at listening. I don't listen to people very well. I don't think I listen to much of anything well. There are many reasons why I don't listen. Mostly I think I am just a little to distracted all the time. The following are other reasons why I might not be very good at listening:
Thank you for your patience while I tried to explain an experience that was slightly cooler than my average walk home from the library.
I went to the library this evening, as I am sometime prone to do on Friday nights. There is something about seeing all the empty tables in the periodicals that makes me feel like a real academic devotee. I just kind of feel like a Nike commercial. I feel like as I take my seat in the library there is a narrator (preferably Morgan Freeman) saying something like, "While everyone else is at some two-bit dance in the Cannon Center, Nick Hales takes his place among the pantheon of BYU greats by studying on a Friday." The lights fade to black...Just do it.
Sidenote: I youtube searched for quite some time to find a Nike commercial I could put here that would properly reflect my vision, but I couldn't find anything. The closest I got was this. You can just imagine me in that commercial, only my head would turn into a textbook.
Unfortunately it turns out that this library session was not one of my greatest library sessions of all time. I had just eaten a five dollar footlong, and this led to a certain degree of sleepiness. I ended up having one of those naps where I wake up in a violent burping fit and both of my hands have fallen asleep. Not my finest hour.
Having not lived up to my big dreams for the library I decided to head back to my humble abode and call it a night. I began my journey in somewhat melancholy spirits. The library was a failure, the footlong was sittin a little weird in my stomache, and it was just starting to snow. I called my brother to say hello, but got the message machine. He texted me back informing me that he was in, "Clash of the Freaking Titans." This boosted my spirits and gave me a slight chuckle because I couldn't decide if he meant, "I'm calling this movie Clash of the Freaking Titans because I think it is so incredibly awesome that it needs a freaking in the title" or "I'm calling this movie Clash of the Freaking Titans because it freaking stinks." Having already seen the movie at the midnight showing this morning, I realized that it was probably the latter.
After this boost in my spirits I was in a considerably better mood. The only thing left to drag me down was the fact that I had Tears for Fears' Everybody Wants to Rule the World stuck in my head. Now at this point most of you are probably thinking, "What's bad about that? I love that song." I love it too. It's just been in my head for far too long. Far too long. This probably resulted from one too many visits over here.
In an attempt to get this song out of my head I tried really really hard to listen to other things that were happening around me. Do other people do this? Do other people try to kick weird songs out of their head by listening as hard as they can to what is going on around them? I hope so.
As I was listening I was reminded of a song that I learned about in my Music 101 class last semester. It was composed by John Cage, and it is titled 4 minutes and 33 seconds. The basic idea is that the piece is simply 4 minutes and 33 seconds of silence. Everyone in the concert hall experiences the piece slightly differently. The music is composed of whatever it is people hear during those 4 minutes and 33 seconds. I performed and listened to my own version of 4 minutes and 33 seconds walking home from the library today.
First of all, I am going to toot my own horn here and just say that I am pretty dang good at performing this piece of music. Pretty dang good.
Since coming to college I have come to appreciate a lot of things. I am a firm believer that one can appreciate almost anything if you learn enough about it. I used to think that modern art was the exception to this rule I have come to appreciate quite a few pieces of art this year, but I still feel like I am not quite there with modern art yet. Clearly these artists are doing something right. People actually appreciate their work. I just have felt at times like I didn't understand what they were all about. I have recently had opportunities to try to learn just what it is that modern artists are trying to do. Still don't understand it. I'm trying.
Tonight as I walked home from the library I feel like I finally appreciated what John Cage was thinking when he did this. Despite the fact that my efforts to listen to the things around me were only incited by a desire to dispose of a Tears for Fears song, I really, really enjoyed listening to my environment. Not in a cliche, random-song-erupts-out-of-regular-noises-in the-surroundings way. Not at all like this.
Sidenote: Some of you might not like me for saying this, but I just don't really like Phil Collins. It's not because he composes modern art, and it's not because I don't know enough about him, I just don't really like his work. Glad I got that off my chest.
I don't share this because I want you all to think that I am some super sophisticated art lover who understands things that you don't. In reality that couldn't really be farther from the truth. However, I sincerely enjoyed taking a second to listen to what was happening around me.
Recently my good man C. Cloyd Barton blogged about how he wanted to be good at basketball. He called for people to comment on his blog about what they would like to be good at. Of course, my initial response was that I would like to be good at eating lots of hot dogs really really fast. However, in the spirit of seriousness, I think I would like to be better at listening. I don't listen to people very well. I don't think I listen to much of anything well. There are many reasons why I don't listen. Mostly I think I am just a little to distracted all the time. The following are other reasons why I might not be very good at listening:
- I have a Tears for Fears song stuck in my head and everything else is just too quiet to get picked up.
- I am too busy pondering why I would actually spend 11 dollars to go see the midnight show of Clash of the Freaking Titans to hear what is happening around me.
Thank you for your patience while I tried to explain an experience that was slightly cooler than my average walk home from the library.
things you don't, and shouldn't, see everyday
Sometimes I see things and I think to myself, "well you don't see that everyday, but that's probably a good thing." Here are some of those things:
- A line at Teriyaki Stix: I love a good plate of Teriyaki as much as the next guy, but this place just doesn't do it for me. Why people would wait in line for this I have no intelligent guess.
- Bee Money: I don't see him everyday, but I'm kinda glad I don't.
- LA Clippers Jerseys
- Apricot Sauce on everything imaginable
- Levitating Filipino businessmen
- Giraffes smoking dope
- Delorians
- Dude Ranch blogs
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Friday, March 26, 2010
I will never, ever, give you notes
Waaa Waaa Waaa I slept through class today/ had to work/ was out of town/ was taking a test/ generic excuse/ other generic excuse can somebody please send me notes from today?
Whenever I get these emails I always want to do one of two things. The first is to send a simple reply back saying "yes" and then just leave it at that. The second thing I have always wanted to do is send an email back listing out, in detail, the reasons why I will not send them notes.
1). Ummm, I don't even take notes in that class. It's freaking Book of Mormon what is there to write down?
2). I don't take notes on my computer. People who do that, more power to ya, but I just don't see the point. And I am not going to type up my hand written notes for you.
3). Even if I did lug around my computer with me to class, how the #($@$@(#$ am I supposed to type up supply and demand graphs or mathematical formulas??
4). Maybe you should show up for class so you can learn? Sounds unreasonable, but it could happen.
5). You coulllled exercise social skills and actually make a friend in your class, so if you actually have a legitimate excuse to miss you can just contact your buddy. Again, I may be pushing my luck with this one.
6). I'm not expert, but most of the time textbooks actually cover lecture material in bigger detail than the lectures do. Again, just a thought.
7). You didn't even mention what class this is for...You can't tell just by the email topic ya nincompoop! You could be asking for notes from my beginning volleyball class for all I know.
8). Despite my obvious coldheartedness on this subject, statistics suggest that there is someone somewhere kind enough to send you notes. So if I sent you notes, it would be a waste of my time and yours because you already got them anyways from someone else.
9). Number nine has been removed due to copyright violation.
10). What can you learn from someone else's notes anyways?
I would now like to quote the great Prof Kearl after someone sent out a pointless email to ECON 110.
"All,
A few minutes ago you received an unsolicited, and unapproved, email from a member of the class asking you to complete a survey. Please disregard this request -- it was done without my knowledge or approval.
A reminder that common courtesy and university policy limit the use of course email lists to matters directly related to the class (in this case, Econ 110).
Have a great weekend!
Prof Kearl"
Common courtesy-fo sho
And because it is SUM 41 week, yeah...
Stay tuned for SportSCenter, next!
Whenever I get these emails I always want to do one of two things. The first is to send a simple reply back saying "yes" and then just leave it at that. The second thing I have always wanted to do is send an email back listing out, in detail, the reasons why I will not send them notes.
1). Ummm, I don't even take notes in that class. It's freaking Book of Mormon what is there to write down?
2). I don't take notes on my computer. People who do that, more power to ya, but I just don't see the point. And I am not going to type up my hand written notes for you.
3). Even if I did lug around my computer with me to class, how the #($@$@(#$ am I supposed to type up supply and demand graphs or mathematical formulas??
4). Maybe you should show up for class so you can learn? Sounds unreasonable, but it could happen.
5). You coulllled exercise social skills and actually make a friend in your class, so if you actually have a legitimate excuse to miss you can just contact your buddy. Again, I may be pushing my luck with this one.
6). I'm not expert, but most of the time textbooks actually cover lecture material in bigger detail than the lectures do. Again, just a thought.
7). You didn't even mention what class this is for...You can't tell just by the email topic ya nincompoop! You could be asking for notes from my beginning volleyball class for all I know.
8). Despite my obvious coldheartedness on this subject, statistics suggest that there is someone somewhere kind enough to send you notes. So if I sent you notes, it would be a waste of my time and yours because you already got them anyways from someone else.
9). Number nine has been removed due to copyright violation.
10). What can you learn from someone else's notes anyways?
I would now like to quote the great Prof Kearl after someone sent out a pointless email to ECON 110.
"All,
A few minutes ago you received an unsolicited, and unapproved, email from a member of the class asking you to complete a survey. Please disregard this request -- it was done without my knowledge or approval.
A reminder that common courtesy and university policy limit the use of course email lists to matters directly related to the class (in this case, Econ 110).
Have a great weekend!
Prof Kearl"
Common courtesy-fo sho
And because it is SUM 41 week, yeah...
Stay tuned for SportSCenter, next!
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
IS ANYBODY ELSE SEEING THIS
Sum 41 lead singer Deryk Whibley
Cyndi LauperTHINK ABOUT IT.
Have you ever seen this two in the same place at the same time? How do we know they're not the same person?
We don't.
Have you ever seen this two in the same place at the same time? How do we know they're not the same person?
We don't.
Sum 41: The Beginnings
As promised, here are some tidbits on the band.
Drummer Steve Jocz got his start playing in the one hit wonder band, the waitresses. As you can tell from the video, he wasn't actually a drummer at the time, but was instead a jazzy saxophone player. Wikipedia tells me that Steve is "known for his toilet humor during interviews." If there was such thing as a "token bad boy" in Sum 41, Steve would be him.
Lead singer Deryck Whibley also had got his big break in the 80's, but in a somewhat different form. Deryck landed a gig as a stand-in for Cyndi Lauper when she filmed her video for her hit song "All Through the Night."
For those of you who merely clicked the links just to understand what I was talking about and then continued reading. Go back now and watch the whole videos. They're worth it. Trust me.
Lastly, Bass player Jason McCaslin got his big break working as a janitor at the prestigious MIT. While cleaning after hours, he was able to solve an incredibly difficult equation that one of the math professors had left written on the board. When this professor discovered Jason's talent, he took him to a psychologist who helped him turn around his life. Unfortunately that didn't work out and now Jason is in Sum 41. (Didn't understand that joke? Step over here.)
This concludes part one of what may be a one part series of Sum 41 updates. Sum 41 week is getting old fast. I'm just not sure if I can handle any more teen angst. (Ally may have called that one) I'm so sick of Sum 41, you might even say that, metaphorically speaking, I'm in too deep.
Drummer Steve Jocz got his start playing in the one hit wonder band, the waitresses. As you can tell from the video, he wasn't actually a drummer at the time, but was instead a jazzy saxophone player. Wikipedia tells me that Steve is "known for his toilet humor during interviews." If there was such thing as a "token bad boy" in Sum 41, Steve would be him.
Lead singer Deryck Whibley also had got his big break in the 80's, but in a somewhat different form. Deryck landed a gig as a stand-in for Cyndi Lauper when she filmed her video for her hit song "All Through the Night."
For those of you who merely clicked the links just to understand what I was talking about and then continued reading. Go back now and watch the whole videos. They're worth it. Trust me.
Lastly, Bass player Jason McCaslin got his big break working as a janitor at the prestigious MIT. While cleaning after hours, he was able to solve an incredibly difficult equation that one of the math professors had left written on the board. When this professor discovered Jason's talent, he took him to a psychologist who helped him turn around his life. Unfortunately that didn't work out and now Jason is in Sum 41. (Didn't understand that joke? Step over here.)
This concludes part one of what may be a one part series of Sum 41 updates. Sum 41 week is getting old fast. I'm just not sure if I can handle any more teen angst. (Ally may have called that one) I'm so sick of Sum 41, you might even say that, metaphorically speaking, I'm in too deep.
Monday, March 22, 2010
SUM 41 WEEK
As some of you may know, I am a big admired of Lisa and Ally's blog. They have been blogging for quite some time now, and I'm a big fan of their work. To read their blog, simply step over here.
On their blog, Lisa and Ally have done something that I have always admired. They like to tackle important topics by devoting whole weeks of their lives to living a certain lifestyle. One example of this was when they devoted a week of their lives to living without shelves. (Actually it turns out they were so devoted to this lifestyle that they actually still aren't using their shelves).
Having been an admirer of this spirit for quite some time, I really wanted to try it out for myself. I am devoting this week to Sum 41. I want to see how the other half lives. The half who listens to nothing but Sum 41.
Each day I will be doing an informational snippet about some facet of the band. We will address questions such as the following:
Where did their name come from?
What happened to the Indo-Guyanese guy?
(I specifically looked up his race to be politically correct. My apologies to Dave Baksh if Wikipedia got it wrong)
Join me and together we will see just what it is that makes this band so special.
On their blog, Lisa and Ally have done something that I have always admired. They like to tackle important topics by devoting whole weeks of their lives to living a certain lifestyle. One example of this was when they devoted a week of their lives to living without shelves. (Actually it turns out they were so devoted to this lifestyle that they actually still aren't using their shelves).
Having been an admirer of this spirit for quite some time, I really wanted to try it out for myself. I am devoting this week to Sum 41. I want to see how the other half lives. The half who listens to nothing but Sum 41.
Each day I will be doing an informational snippet about some facet of the band. We will address questions such as the following:Where did their name come from?
What happened to the Indo-Guyanese guy?
(I specifically looked up his race to be politically correct. My apologies to Dave Baksh if Wikipedia got it wrong)
Join me and together we will see just what it is that makes this band so special.
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Good words
Allegedly-
i.e. "I'm allegedly going to go take a test"
Kerfluffle-
i.e. "Boy the middle east is in one kerfluffle right now"
Crum!-Perhaps the greatest fake swearword out there.
i.e. "OH, CRUM, I LOST MY PENCIL SHARPENER"
Dope
i.e. "Ronald Reagan had a super dope foreign policy"
Dunce
i.e. "You can't tax a natural monopoly you dunce!"
Wow
i.e. 'Freaking wooooooow Traayvor"
Opportunity Cost-
i.e. "What is the opportunity cost of reading your scriptures?"
W'all-Similar to Y'all, but W'all
i.e. W'all are going to McDonalds, you want to come with us?
i.e. "I'm allegedly going to go take a test"
Kerfluffle-
i.e. "Boy the middle east is in one kerfluffle right now"
Crum!-Perhaps the greatest fake swearword out there.
i.e. "OH, CRUM, I LOST MY PENCIL SHARPENER"
Dope
i.e. "Ronald Reagan had a super dope foreign policy"
Dunce
i.e. "You can't tax a natural monopoly you dunce!"
Wow
i.e. 'Freaking wooooooow Traayvor"
Opportunity Cost-
i.e. "What is the opportunity cost of reading your scriptures?"
W'all-Similar to Y'all, but W'all
i.e. W'all are going to McDonalds, you want to come with us?
Monday, March 15, 2010
Big News
I just was on the web just now, and I got to doing a little snooping. Why was I snooping? Well, I had just commented on BLOG OF CLOYD and had completely roasted Caleb Barton. (To read my roast, step over here.)
As you might have noticed, while roasting Cloyd I mentioned Lisa Frank. After a brief moment of nostalgia over my many elementary school Lisa-Frank-Clad girlfriends, I decided to do some snooping and find out how exactly how Lisa Frank came to be. It turns out that Lisa Frank is actually a person. (To read more about that, step over here.)
Not only is she a person, but she has also previously been sued by the FTC for asking little girls to put their full names, addresses, phone numbers, and the hours when their parents wouldn't be home on her website. But that is neither here nor there.
While reading up on Frank, I noticed that she attended Kingswood School (now known as Cranbrook Kingswood school). Here is where things get interesting.
After doing even more detective work, I uncovered that another prominent American attended Kingswood school. Who was this you might ask? None other than the prominent republican politician Mitt Romney.
Now, at this point you are probably asking yourself, "Why is this important?" The answer to that question is because it allowed me to do this without feeling too guilty about it.
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is Boho Sheek.
As you might have noticed, while roasting Cloyd I mentioned Lisa Frank. After a brief moment of nostalgia over my many elementary school Lisa-Frank-Clad girlfriends, I decided to do some snooping and find out how exactly how Lisa Frank came to be. It turns out that Lisa Frank is actually a person. (To read more about that, step over here.)
Not only is she a person, but she has also previously been sued by the FTC for asking little girls to put their full names, addresses, phone numbers, and the hours when their parents wouldn't be home on her website. But that is neither here nor there.
While reading up on Frank, I noticed that she attended Kingswood School (now known as Cranbrook Kingswood school). Here is where things get interesting.
After doing even more detective work, I uncovered that another prominent American attended Kingswood school. Who was this you might ask? None other than the prominent republican politician Mitt Romney.
Now, at this point you are probably asking yourself, "Why is this important?" The answer to that question is because it allowed me to do this without feeling too guilty about it.
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is Boho Sheek.
Thursday, March 11, 2010
How to be a tool
I've noticed that if you want to be a tool, there are a few easy things that you can do to let others know that you are a tool.
1. Play the piano in the Wilk. That piano is not meant to be played, no one cares that you can play the piano and you're not impressing anybody because 99 percent of BYU plays the piano.
2. Launch stuff with slingshots down a dorm hall, such as hot pockets or muffins.
3. When you have the floor, it is not okay to just talk and talk and talk about nothing while other people are waiting to speak and or perform talents. A floor in this sense is not a public good, when you consume, it effects others.
4. Go to the econ lab with no idea how to do the homework and ask the tas to do it for you when you obviously have no clue what you're talking about.
5. Actually like the Utah Jazz, Denver Nuggets, L.A. Lakers, or any other just classless teams.
6. Play supersmah bros everyday and not even be good enough to get all 45 kills on stock 15.
7. Make people cut their hair for a intramural game.
1. Play the piano in the Wilk. That piano is not meant to be played, no one cares that you can play the piano and you're not impressing anybody because 99 percent of BYU plays the piano.
2. Launch stuff with slingshots down a dorm hall, such as hot pockets or muffins.
3. When you have the floor, it is not okay to just talk and talk and talk about nothing while other people are waiting to speak and or perform talents. A floor in this sense is not a public good, when you consume, it effects others.
4. Go to the econ lab with no idea how to do the homework and ask the tas to do it for you when you obviously have no clue what you're talking about.
5. Actually like the Utah Jazz, Denver Nuggets, L.A. Lakers, or any other just classless teams.
6. Play supersmah bros everyday and not even be good enough to get all 45 kills on stock 15.
7. Make people cut their hair for a intramural game.
Monday, March 8, 2010
This Ice Cream Tastes Like the Truman Show
Although I can't explain it in concrete terms, the Dairy Products in Utah taste bad to me. They do. This is no knock on the great state of Utah. I have enjoyed the last 8 months or so. I just miss the sweet taste of milk. In short, I miss this.
After reviewing this problem with many of my closest friends and consiglieres, we have come up with two schools of thought regarding the nasty-taste-in-my-mouth-caused-by-Utah-dairy-products-quandry. My opinions land firmly on one side of this debate. See if you can tell which theory I agree with.
1) It could be that there is something involved in the creation/processing of the dairy products in Utah that just doesn't sit right with my taste buds. Perhaps some sort of chemical or preservative that is just ever so tiny. Other people don't notice this difference, but it sticks out to me because of my superhuman senses.
2) My life is a small scale version of Peter Weir's 1998 film The Truman Show and when I'm not looking, a camera crew poisons all of the dairy products I am about to eat.
I think it's pretty obvious that only one of these results is plausible. So let me just say that to every member of the secret camera crew ruining my dairy experience, I will do this to every one of you if my dairy products don't start to taste better right away.
Saturday, March 6, 2010
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Shame on You Coldplay
Hey I just thought I would hop on and let everyone know that I too am filing a law suit against Coldplay for their song Viva La Vida. They copied a jam I wrote for the Didgeridoo back when I was at Woodstock. More information to follow.
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Mission Calls
What I'm about to say might not make sense to some people, so allow me to give a brief introduction. I am very excited about all the guys on our floor getting their mission calls. They are great guys and they're going to be great missionaries in their respective areas of labor. Each one is as exciting and unique as the next.
That being said, I realized the other day that when I find out where someone is going on a mission, my brain automatically calculates the troop bonus that they will each recieve geographically according to the Risk model.
By my calculations, our floor almost has the North American Bonus. We have guys going to the Alberta, Western United States, Eastern United States, and Central America (the latter being perhaps the most critical choke point on the whole board).
Thanks to Cameron and Dan we also have 1/4 of South America.
Griffin allowed us to get our feet in the door on Africa, I think everyone's pretty pumped about that.
Europe is also optimistic. Matt took care of Northern Europe, Jared helped out with Great Britain, and Colton and Cameron Hadley have allowed us to control Western Europe. Austin Has Scandanavia on lock.
Australia and Asia still evade our grasp. We're optimistic though. Evan's call is to be opened tonight. The fate of the world hangs in the balance.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
My job
This will be a quick post, I have to go to the office tomorrow for work. Now you may be wondering where I work. I work at ECON 110. It's a full time job, and if you treat it as such, you will benefit greatly. I will have meetings with Mr. Barton and Mr. Hales and we embark on our quest of conquering Kearl. In fact, I am about to put in some overtime hours to discover the exciting topic of demand elasticity.
The best part about work is the "roast of the day." We usually have a good laugh about these at the water cooler or during coffee breaks. These new interns they bring in just don't understand that you can't answer a question imperfectly without getting absolutely roasted by the Man. I really think that we could expand our PPF by firing these interns and replacing them with seasoned ECON 110 pros.
yeah...
The best part about work is the "roast of the day." We usually have a good laugh about these at the water cooler or during coffee breaks. These new interns they bring in just don't understand that you can't answer a question imperfectly without getting absolutely roasted by the Man. I really think that we could expand our PPF by firing these interns and replacing them with seasoned ECON 110 pros.
yeah...
Monday, January 25, 2010
24 Hour Fitness; The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly.
Imagine a Buffet, open 24 hours. The possibilities are endless. Why, other than to maintain your dignity, would you seek employment? After collecting the required $7.99, you dwell like Adam in Eden. You witness, firsthand, a true economic phenomena. Scholars argue the impossibility of something for nothing...they say "there is no free lunch." Well I beg a 24 hour $7.99 buffet is the closest thing to a free lunch as there can be...except its a free breakfast, lunch, dinner, and a nice warm booth for your daily Siesta.
Interestingly, food doesn't seem to be motivating enough to attract all classes. Take a Ci'Ci's pizza buffet for instance. Indeed, it is a coming together of american blue collar society, all working classes represented. The obese are also included, irrelevant to class, as the obese are a class in their own respect represented in both working class and bourgeoisie.
However, there is a "free lunch" in abstract respects in 24 Hour Fitness centers across America. Sweat is a substance shared between all. Exercise is certainly not a positional good (the converse supports this assertion, as obese people are represented in all classes).
Tonight, a night of exercise, a night of observation, has led to this conclusion. some observed 24 hour fitness types
- "sequined sweatsuit So-Cal Girl"- these breeds frequent 24 hour fitness between the hours of 6 and 9:30, prime time to meet guys. They can be found walking .25 MPH on the treadmill in a pair of UGG boots, a sequined juicy coutour sweatsuit (black OR pink), hair professionally styled, reading a US weekly magazine, texting on their blackberries, and listening to their ipods (while chewing gum....how do they do it?)
- UFC wannabe- Hair spiked, wife beater, throwing punches as they pound out the miles (in 30 second intervals)
-Ultra competitive basketball types- enough said, these guys deserve respect
-New Years Resolutioners
-Dri-Fit-ers- guys who splurge on expensive workout clothes to hop on the elliptical for 3 minutes
-locker room types- they never seem to leave the locker room
-water fountain types- never seem to leave the water fountain
-meatheads- make a scene yelling when they get that one last rep (also wear Ed-Hardy Hats)
and last but not least
-guys who go to the aerobic dance and jazzercize classes- seriously guys? if its to pick up girls, I commend you, but with animosity.
Although open 24 hours, its still always impossible to get a treadmill. Utah loves treadmills apparently.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Inspired by Choir
Today I decided to go to ward choir. What an experience! I learned so much about singing in 20 minutes than a whole life's worth of sacrament meetings put together. Here are some rules of singing for those of you who may not share my same abilities as a singer.
1.T/B does not stand for Tuberculosis
Well it turns out that T/B stands for tenor/bass. There are two separate parts for the males in the choir to sing. It's a good thing I was sitting next to Dylan MacFillen, or else I would have imitated a tuberculosis patient when it came time for that part.
2. Don't upset the director
It'll be the last thing you ever, ever do. You think I'm kidding, but I'm not. You can't disrupt the hierarchy, it's too dangerous. A coup would be suicide. You try to leave, but you just get captured right back in.
3. I make a great 1st chair bass.
It turns out that the rest of the bass players were absolutely horrible, so I automatically got designated first chair, probably in part due to my fabulous vowels (to be discussed later). I was the only bass player that found a way to sing the girl's part a few octaves lower, all the other ones were making horrific attempts to harmonize or somethin' stupid like that. Who needs harmomy, anyways?
...But it turns out that they don't even have "chairs" in choir, that just made me first chair so that I would feel good
4.If you don't got the fingers to be a singer, don't even bother.
I was completely unaware before tonight that there is a direct correlation between singing ability and finger shape. How you determine if you have singer's fingers is to put them in a scissors shape, and hold them up to your mouth. This is to properly execute what is known as a "vowel." If your fingers are as wide as your mouth, you're good to go, good luck! If your fingers are wider, than it means either one of two things. You're naturally gifted, or you have no hope. I apparently have wide fingers, so naturally the boss accused me of not being a good singer. However, I personally believe that I have similar finger shape to the likes of Pavaratti and Andrea Bocelli.
5.Some people actually like singing and take it seriously.
Like its fun for them. I'm dead serious right now. Like there are people that take time out of their day for singing and get borderline offended if you don't share that same enthusiasm. whoops.
6. There are three lines of music. You do not sing all of them consecutively, but rather, you pick one line and read that same line throughout. (i.e. sing lines: 2,5,8,11,14 and NOT 1,2,3,4,5,6,7 etc...)
7. Knowing the words to the song does not mean you know the song:
When the boss asks you, "ok, who knows this song?" you cannot simply read through the words and say that you know it. You have to know the words that go with it. Stupid, I know, but singers like to have there own way of doing things.
If any of you are thinking about joining ward choir, I recommend going for a day, than dropping it like it's Kearl's econ class (even though me, Nick and Caleb are goin' to work in that class right now). Even though it's pass/fail, ward choir (MUS 998) is extremely tough (note the high number).
1.T/B does not stand for Tuberculosis
Well it turns out that T/B stands for tenor/bass. There are two separate parts for the males in the choir to sing. It's a good thing I was sitting next to Dylan MacFillen, or else I would have imitated a tuberculosis patient when it came time for that part.
2. Don't upset the director
It'll be the last thing you ever, ever do. You think I'm kidding, but I'm not. You can't disrupt the hierarchy, it's too dangerous. A coup would be suicide. You try to leave, but you just get captured right back in.
3. I make a great 1st chair bass.
It turns out that the rest of the bass players were absolutely horrible, so I automatically got designated first chair, probably in part due to my fabulous vowels (to be discussed later). I was the only bass player that found a way to sing the girl's part a few octaves lower, all the other ones were making horrific attempts to harmonize or somethin' stupid like that. Who needs harmomy, anyways?
...But it turns out that they don't even have "chairs" in choir, that just made me first chair so that I would feel good
4.If you don't got the fingers to be a singer, don't even bother.
I was completely unaware before tonight that there is a direct correlation between singing ability and finger shape. How you determine if you have singer's fingers is to put them in a scissors shape, and hold them up to your mouth. This is to properly execute what is known as a "vowel." If your fingers are as wide as your mouth, you're good to go, good luck! If your fingers are wider, than it means either one of two things. You're naturally gifted, or you have no hope. I apparently have wide fingers, so naturally the boss accused me of not being a good singer. However, I personally believe that I have similar finger shape to the likes of Pavaratti and Andrea Bocelli.
5.Some people actually like singing and take it seriously.
Like its fun for them. I'm dead serious right now. Like there are people that take time out of their day for singing and get borderline offended if you don't share that same enthusiasm. whoops.
6. There are three lines of music. You do not sing all of them consecutively, but rather, you pick one line and read that same line throughout. (i.e. sing lines: 2,5,8,11,14 and NOT 1,2,3,4,5,6,7 etc...)
7. Knowing the words to the song does not mean you know the song:
When the boss asks you, "ok, who knows this song?" you cannot simply read through the words and say that you know it. You have to know the words that go with it. Stupid, I know, but singers like to have there own way of doing things.
If any of you are thinking about joining ward choir, I recommend going for a day, than dropping it like it's Kearl's econ class (even though me, Nick and Caleb are goin' to work in that class right now). Even though it's pass/fail, ward choir (MUS 998) is extremely tough (note the high number).
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